I spend every 3hrs of each day trying my hardest to teach you to self settle yourself to sleep. So you can rest your beautiful mind, body and soul giving you the best chance to develop and be the best you can be.

I bounce you, I pat you, I walk around with you, I sing to you, I give you a cuddly teddy, I give you another, I feed you again, I cuddle you, I lay with you, I sit with you, I then go back to bouncing and pating etc. Then all of a sudden you sleep. All the attempts have paid off – wohooo your asleep. Right? I should be happy? Thats what your meant to do. Sleep.

So why when you sleep do I miss you so much. I count the minutes until I can cuddle and kiss you again. I come and see you sleeping in your cot a hundred times an evening (just checking your ok of course). I touch your hand, I place my hand on your heart, I kiss your forehead. I lay in bed secretly hoping you’ll wake up before I sleep just so I can hold you. I miss your baby smell, your little eys looking at me, your smile when you see me, your hand hitting my chest when your feeding-I just miss YOU.

You see Kobi, no matter how many times mummy might say she needs a break, and how I wished you’d just sleep when your meant to. The truth is I will always miss you when your not in my arms.

Love your very sado mumio xx mwah xx

“newbie family on a journey from coupletoparenthood”